From Me to Me

I had lunch with my BFF (what am I, 13?) Felicia yesterday. We started talking about something we talk about often - how much we hate being adults. This subject always seems to come up when we get together and start talking about our lives, basically meaning our jobs and our bills. This is pretty much how the conversation usually goes:

"I hate being an adult."
"Me too. Being an adult sucks."
"You know how when you're a teenager, you think you're going to have so much freedom as an adult?"
"Yeah."
"That is such bulls***"
"Yep, total crap."
"When you're an adult, you don't have any freedom! You have to work all the time so you can pay bills, and you're still broke!"
"Ugh, bills. I don't want to talk about it. It stresses me out."

That's the generic conversation. This last time, it took the twist of discussing what we would tell ourselves if we could go back in time and talk to ourselves. In the spirit of this conversation, here is what I would say to my 15-year-old self. The responses of "myself" are obviously hypothetical, as I have no way of knowing what "myself" would say.

ME: Hi. I'm you, and I need to talk to you.
MYSELF: Really? How old are you?
ME: Almost 24. Now -
MYSELF: Who did I marry? How many kids do I have.
ME: I don't know. And none, so far.
MYSELF: But -
ME: Will you just listen! I have some things to tell you.
MYSELF: What kind of things?
ME: Okay, you're ready to listen now? Because this stuff is important. Here we go.

Don't be afraid to stand up for yourself. You don't have to put up with people treating you badly.

You are NOT FAT. I know you got picked on for being fat. I know you think you're fat. But you are NOT! But if you keep thinking such bad things about yourself and eating for comfort, you will be.

Be nice to your mother. She loves you, and she'll save your life. Save your money. I cannot stress this enough! Save everything you can.

You'll meet a girl named Josalyn your freshman year of college. Stay away from her. You'll make other friends. Just trust me.

Don't ever let anyone tell you that you aren't worth much. No one has the right to make you feel less than you are.

Don't worry about boys. I know all your friends have boyfriends and I know you're lonely, but trust me. They are more trouble than they are worth.

Did I mention that you should save your money? Oh, and when Mom talks you into getting a credit card for emergencies, ONLY USE IT FOR EMERGENCIES.

Major in something like Business or English Lit, not Recreation Management. It won't be as fun, but will be more rewarding.

Oh, and save your money.