Happy Birthday to Me!

I just returned the from best birthday adventure EVER!

Oh, you'd like to hear all about it? Well, sure, I'd love to share it with you.

Saturday morning, I took off for Utah, where I was going to spend my birthday with my great friend Jessie and her husband Jason. Aren't they cute? Don't they just look like so much fun?

I have to tell you, I had the best birthday. First, Jessie and I went to this great (and cheap) little place for pedicures. They did the whole deal - soaking, conditioning, trimming the cuticles, even a paraffin dip. The pedicurist even managed to scrape the calluses off my poor heels, which were starting to look like hooves.

I chose a pretty reddish-pink color for my toes.

Don't they look nice? I even sprung the extra couple of bucks for a flower.

In this close-up of my big toe, you can see said flower, as well as the dry skin that is screaming out for foot cream. Sorry.

After the pedicures, we went to my very favorite Utah restaurant, Cafe Rio. This was particularly nice of Jessie, since she doesn't actually like Cafe Rio. True friends go to restaurants they hate for their BFF's.

After lunch, we spent the afternoon kicking it at Jessie's parents pool. I swam without self-consciousness, laid in the sun, laughed at the SPF 8 sunscreen (SPF 8! Ha!) and got a little sunburned. It was bliss.

The next day we went back to the pool in the morning, where I applied sunscreen but still came out a little crispier than I would like. Ah well, pink is better that pasty white, right?

That evening was the main event, the American Idols Live Concert! Yes, I'm that much of a dork, and I'm not even ashamed of it. This concert rocked!

It was held at the E Center in Salt Lake, and it was packed!

Jessie and I were discussing the amount of people, and her dad said, "Pshaw! This would never hold a Rolling Stones concert!"

The concert was amazing! It started from 10 and worked up through the top ten Idols. When Chikezie came onstage, my first thought was, "Wow, he's a real person!" We had amazing seats too.

Here's Syesha - she was great, if a little scantily clad. But heck, if my boobs and legs looked that great, I'd probably show them off too.

And look! It's Micheal Johns in real life! He was probably my second favorite of all the performers. He had the crowd all worked up, too.

Oh, but wait for it! Here he is! The love of my life! The main reason I went to the concert - David Cook! Ohmigosh! I was like thisclose to him!! Of course he stuck his arm out right as I snapped the picture, but that's okay because his face is safe and secure in my mind. Do I sound like a stalker? Because I'm not, I swear. Perfectly normal celebrity crush. Really.

And here's a random picture of an arm. I don't know when this was taken. Probably as I tried frantically to get another picture of David after having lost all train of thought when he was so close.

After the killer concert, we drove home and I slept peacefully despite the ringing in my ears, and dreamt of singing, red carpets and David Cook.

The next day I drove home. It's about a five hour drive, but who cares when you get to look at scenery like this?

Seriously, I love my home. It's the best.

You may have noticed that there are no pictures of me on my birthday. Well, I took some, but not a single one turned out well. So here I am today - do I look older now that I'm 24? Not looking my best for sure. No makeup, hair pulled back, in desperate need of a bang trim. At least I only have one chin.

Happy my Birthday!

American Idol

Not much time for a recap, but I did catch Idol this week, and I just have to say - David Cook's redition of Mariah Carey's "Always Be My Baby"?

Amazing!

If he came out with an album right now, I'd be all over faster than a redneck on bacon.

Still snowing. It's like a snowglobe here, I swear.

A List of Things I'd Like to Tell You

1.) American Idol - hallelujah! How glad are we that this girl is gone? Answer - SO GLAD.

2.) Remember the snarky Post Office experience a while back? Well, a few days later, this came.

If you can't read it, it says, "Damaged by Mechanical Equipment. Please accept our apologies," followed by "Returned for Better Address." What do these people want from me?

3.) If you read Vintage Thirty, you might remember the post Tootsie Farklepants wrote about blue sheep butts. If you're about to click on that link, the good stuff is in the comments. I was reminded of this while putting inventory in at work recently. This is a product we carry that is used to determine when cows are in heat:

Let's just zoom in on that bottom corner, shall we?

Okay, seriously? How freaking funny is that? Just in case you can't quite figure out what this product is for, we'll illustrate it for you. And notice that it's two female cows. Actually, there's a reason for that, but it's funnier if you don't know it.

4.) You know how "Spring Fever" doesn't really refer to body temperature, but to a fit of looniness? Well, I had my first bout the other day. It involved singing a Primary song, complete with actions.

I looked out the window

And what did I see?
Popcorn popping on the apricot tree!
Spring has brought me such a nice surprise
Popcorn popping right before my eyes.

I can take an armful and make a treat
A popcorn ball that would smell so sweet
It wasn't really so,
But it seemed to me
Popcorn popping on the apricot tree!

5.) So. Have you heard I'm going to Alaska? I'm kind of excited about it. I'm leaving in 2 1/2 days. Two days and 14 hours, to be exact. I might be outside of the blogosphere for a while, so try not to miss me too much. I know it'll be hard, but just do your best.

6.) You may recognize this little baby from my Christmas wish list.

Well, I bought one yesterday. It's just a silver one, because it was $65 cheaper than the colors. I am so not paying $65 just for red. This purchase was necessary because my ancient iPod Mini finally crapped out. Totally. No worko. And once you go iPod, you can never go back.

7.) And finally, in case you missed the memo, I'm about to go on kind of a big trip. I've got a four hour lay-over in Seattle. Can anyone recommend a really good book? I've been having a hard time finding one lately.

Hugs and kisses, Blogger friends!

American Idol: Top 11

Last night was the worst episode of American Idol this season. The Beatles two weeks in a row? What were they thinking?

None of the performances were spectacular. I think the contestants used up all their spectacular last week, with the exception of David Archuleta, who used no spectacular last week, unless you define spectacular as forgetting the lyrics. He did much better this week, with McCartney's "Long Winding Road," but still no fireworks.

I thought the best performances of the night were by Chikezie (who, I'm convinces, uses only his first name because his last name is utterly unpronounceable) and Syesha.


Chikezie sang "I've Just Seen a Face." He started out slow and ballady, but kicked it up and turned it into a bluegrass number. He also played a harmonica, which was a ridiculous attempt to be like everyone else in the instrument department. The slow part didn't do much for the performance, but once he got into it, I thought it was a lot of fun.


Syesha was the best performance of the night with an amazing performance of "Yesterday." It was heartfelt and beautifully sung. Plus, her dress was great. Simon said it was the song Brooke should have sung, which I felt was rude of him, especially when Syesha did such a great job.

Honorable mentions also go to Carly Smithson with "Blackbird" and Brooke White with "Here Comes the Sun." Both of them got flayed by the judges, but I thought they were both great. Carly actually only got flayed by Simon, who thought the message of the song was bad, but it was good to hear her sing a song ballad instead of belting it with her big fat voice. Brooke's performance was, admittedly, not her best. She kind of flailed around in her dancing, but it was clear she was having fun, and that was infectious. She took the criticism of the judges with incredible grace, even going so far as to agree with Randy when he said she was a little awkward. "Yeah," she said, "I am a little awkward when I move."

I'm torn between Kristy Lee and Ramiele for who should go home. Neither of them are that great, but at least Kristy Lee has been bringing her best to the table. Ramiele's just not doing it for me. And I'm still made David Hernandez was kicked off. Stupid America.

**Photos are, as always, from last week.

Good Night and Good Luck: American Idol Losers

And by "losers," I mean lost the competition, not as a reflection of personal worth.

Finally! This guy just drove me nuts. I was worried that the 13-year-old-girl vote would keep him in there, but the 13-ers made the right choice.

Ah, Luke. I was so torn about you. You're so cute, with your strong-jawed, dimpled scruffiness, but you just weren't that good. Not that you were bad, you just weren't as good as you could have been. I wanted to like you. I really did.

Again, finally! She's a very cute girl and all, but she just wasn't up to snuff. She's young, she'll get better.

NNNNNOOOooooooo! She was my very favorite girl. I'm devastated. Okay, I'm not devastated, being as it's a TV show and all, but I am disapointed. I didn't think she would win, but I would have loved watching her for a few more weeks.

A.I. Girls and Condors in Hats

First off, the recap top 8 girl performances from American Idol:

Best Use of Advice
Kristy Lee Cook

Kristy Lee hasn't really been phenomenal this season. She's acutally pretty forgetable. Last week after she sang . . . some song (see? Forgetable), Simon advised her to try for more of a country feel, to really find herself. This week, she applied his advice! I love it when contestants take the advice of the judges - they're professionals and they know what they're talking about. Except for Paula.

Best Run
Carly Smithson

I definitly think Carly is the best girl in the competition. That doesn't mean she's my favorite (that would be Asia'h), but there's not doubt she's incredibly talented. In her performance last night, she sang and run so long and complicated, I felt out of breath for her! Plus, she hit every single note dead on. I would kill for her talent.

Best Performance
Syesha Mercado

I felt like Syesha got gyped last night. She was very last, and the judges had spent so much time yammering (what, were they all on sugar highs? They were like little kids!) that by the time she finished, they all only had two words for her (literally) and then the show ended. It was a real shame, because she did an incredible job. It wasn't the most difficult song ever, but it was solid. She sang with feeling, she nailed every note without hesitation, and get a load of those legs!

And here's a suprise:

Most Fun
Amanda Overmyer!

What? I acutally liked Amanda? What's going on here? She was really good! First of all, her look is better - straight, simple hair and normal clothes with some great accent pieces. She was also one of the few girls to sing a fast-paced song. Her redition of "I Hate Myself For Loving You" was the perfect song for here. It was rock, but it was more on the blues side than the hard rock. Go Amanda!

So who do I think should go? It a tough choice this time, and the last night 4 people will leave.

For the boys: Danny Noriega and Luke Menard, Michael Johns or Chikezie. I have a hard time choosing between the last three. I want to like Luke and Michael; they both have tons of charisma, plus, they're adorable. They're just not that good. I didn't like Chikezie at first, but his last performance was great. I'm torn.

For the girls: Kady Malloy (she's just not that good!) and Ramiele Malubay (she was good at first, but her last few performances haven't been worth much).

And now, on to Condors In Hats.

My life has been kind of stressful lately, and when I get stressed out (or sad, or angry, or excited, or busy) I have weird dreams. It's usually not that big of a deal - I often have weird dreams. When I'm experienced any intense emotion, though, they get weirder and weirder.

Last night? After I was screwed out of the flute performance (I haven't played flute since high school) I worked so hard on, a bunch of condors in suits and fedoras walked in. That's right. Condors. In fedoras. Only they were ultra-creepy, Dark Crystal-esque condors. Think this



combined with this.



And everyone in my dream was like, "Hey! Condors in hats! Whatever." And I was thinking, "Hello! Giant flesh-eating birds!"

Where do I come up with this stuff?

American Idol: Top 8 Boys

Welcome back for another American Idol recap! Last night the top 8 boys preformed music from the 80's: and they rocked! I can't remember the last time I saw an episode with that many good performances. In fact, there weren't really any bad ones (well, maybe one) which made this kind of hard today. And now, without further ado -

Best Arrangement
David Cook with Lionel Richie's "Hello"

David took this kind of sad, very ballad-y song and roughed it up. Randy called it "emo" but I just thought it rocked. It came out as a kind of bluesy-rock power ballad. It was amazing, and I loved that he took a risk and nailed it! So did Simon. He said "That was a very brave thing to do . . . and I loved it."

Most Talented
David Archuleta

I know, I know, I raved about him last week, but the kid is amazing. This week he sang a slower version of "Another Day in Paradise" and he started out at the piano. It wasn't his best performance, but it was still incredible, which just goes to show how talented he really is. And man, does that kid know how to schmooze!

Worst Performance
Danny Noriega

Ugh. He sang one of my all-time favorite songs, "Tainted Love" but it was so girly I could hardly stand it. I know it's his style, but he takes the emo thing (it applies here, not to David Cook, Randy!) way too far. From the uber-tight leather pants to the bumping hips and pocket hook, it just ruined the song for me. But not forever.

Best Performance
David Hernandez

This picture is actually from last week (all of them are, since the Idol people are so lame and don't post pictures right away). I just thought you all might appreciate that cute tush. But back to important issues - David had the guts to sing Celine Dion last night. He sang "It's All Coming Back to Me Now" and all the reasons I love him came back to me. Not only is he gorgeous, but he's got tons of charisma, he knows how to work the cameras, and he's got an amazing voice. I mean, the guy actually pulled off Celine Dion! Not an easy feat! Plus, he looked into the camera with those chocolate brown eyes, and I swooned.

You may or may not have heard the latest dirt on David H. For the last 3 years, he has worked as a male stripper in Phoenix. In a mostly male club. I'm not a fan of the whole stripping thing, but who am I to judge? In my opinion, his discription of the "pea-sized booger" on his nose during a photo shoot (he mentioned it when talking about his most embarrasing moment) managed to cancel out the stripper thing in my mind.

Coming up tonight, the top 8 girls! They're going to have a hard time keeping up with the boys, but we'll see how they do.

And okay, okay, I know I talked about all the Davids last week, but can I help it if they're the best ones?

Back by Popular Demand: American Idol Results

And by "popular demand," I mean because Jessie said so.

In case you missed the American Idol results show, and you depend solely upon me for your American Idol fodder, here's who left the show last night.

These are the girls I predicted would leave, but both of the girls I chose were in the last two. So close! I wasn't all the impressed with Alaina. She wasn't bad, but she wasn't really good either. She's only 17, though, she still has a long way to go. I did like Alexandrea. Her last performance wasn't that great - she picked a really safe song, and she looked terrible - but she really has a great voice. I think she would have been a force to be reckoned with on the show.

But seriously, neither of these girls should have left yet. I stand by my verdict: Amanda is awful, and I had to change the channel when Kady sang. Even Kady knew she should have left - she looked awfully suprised when she heard Alaina was out and she was safe.

BAM! Right on. Who's amazing? That's right - me. Did I call it or what?

Here's the deal with these guys. At the risk of sounding homophobic (which I'm not, I swear) Jason was just too fairy-ish. Danny Noriega is too (he's clearly gay), but he manages to do it in a fashionable, teenage-boy-emo sort of way. Jason is just a Michael Buble style flamer. Although, come to think of it, I'm not sure Michael Buble is a flamer. But you get the drift. As far as Robbie goes, his was mostly a case of supply and demand. There just wasn't enought room for two rockers (three if you count Amanda) on the show, and he got out-sung by David Cook.

Join me next week for American Idol recaps!